Style/Ego Wars (…part 1?)

I thought this had died, but apparently it just went dormant.

It is absolutely unfortunate. It negatively affects so many responses, interactions, and views in the community.

What is the best way for it to be resolved? What is wrong? What is everybody doing?

These things aren’t exclusive to the cardistry community, you see it many different places. But I still think if people recognize what’s going on some of these things can be avoided. 

EGO

Some people have massive egos. Which is okay, but how does it help you by letting it sabotage your interactions with other people. “YOU ARE PWNED.” “You are a N00b311!” These are extreme examples, yes. But why are people doing this bickering. Maybe it’s that the people they are bashing have equally large egos and they want to take them down a peg. 

But I think the best thing to do is just to stop acting like you have a big-ass ego in the first place, or at least try not to act like such an asshole towards others.

I’m not saying don’t stand for what you believe in, but do it with respect and with dignity. 

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IS ANY ONE STYLE ACTUALLY RIGHT?

Everybody is going to have different preferences among so many different things. Is somebody really wrong for liking fans more than cuts? Or for liking cut videos better than uncut videos? No. So if they want to say they like fans more than cuts, good for them.

Why bash people because they don’t conform to your own style? (Note I said “bash”.) Maybe instead of letting your emotions run wild, try to make reasonable cases for what you’re trying to say.

If the other person goes nuts on you, don’t reciprocate. Be nice. They might be disarmed, and it continues to help set the right mood. If they continue to go nuts on you. They’re not worth your time. 

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THERE IS A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN “I THINK” AND “I KNOW”

One problem is that people often make statements as if they are actually a fact rather than stating them as their own opinion. Do not say “This video sucks.” Say “I didn’t like this video.” Or even better, “I thought the video could be better if _____.” Why do you have to berate the person? Did they do something to offend you? Why not be more helpful in your tone.

When you write things as if they are a fact (not saying “I think…”) you better be damn sure that what you’re saying is a fact. There are two dangers if you’re wrong:

1. You are spreading lies and misinformation.

2. People will be rightly offended if you’re spreading lies and misinformation.

It’s just a couple of extra words. “I think” or “I feel.” Use them.

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That’s not even half of it. Consider this a part 1. 

This was a bit of a rant for me as well, but I was prompted by a rather disgusting thread that I saw that was full of this.

Thankfully I believe it is a minority of the community acts in this way, but unfortunately they can be among the most vocal.

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Lastly, if you feel really riled up, why not let it go overnight, do some more concrete thinking rather than acting on impulse in these situations. Let your emotions go through your cardistry rather than against other people.